Of course you do. And there's seriously like 100 photos after the jump. But for now, I'd just like to say that, when Ed Westwick is ready to take a break from having sex with Chace Crawford, I'm available. And I'm willing to totally ignore just how gay that silk scarf is, and instead focus on ways to make it fun and useful in the bedroom. Seriously though. Click through. I uploaded like a gazillion freakin' photos for you guys, so at least look at them, okay? Read More...

Okay, I found the People.com photos -- it's just their cover, but rest assured all the other photos will be on the Internet by tomorrow. Vivienne is on the left, Knox is on the right. What cuties!!!! I like this picture because Angie is gazing adoringly at her child and Brad is gazing adoringly at Angie's breasts. ...

Lindsay Lohan made the trek to the Windy City with gal pal Samantha Ronson for Lollapalooza, where SamRo was playing DJ. Also there: Mark Ronson, Slash, Perry Farrell, and Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz. Please make sure to click through the thumbnails. There's a picture of Samantha Ronson, Slash and a pack of cigarettes (and his young son!) and Perry Farrell. If you look at it long enough, you can actually get a contact high. [gallery]...

As most of you readers know, my darling mother is in town visiting me for a few days. This evening, we decided to take the ferry to Bainbridge Island to have dinner. We ate at an INCREDIBLE restaurant called the Four Swallows. I know, it sounds like cheap porn, but it was actually a very, very fantastic restaurant with amazing food, service and ambiance. We absolutely adored it. I also had the opportunity to hear my mother's opinions on table manners for the first time in soooo many months. Oh, how I'd missed hearing her musings on the way I consume my food! Apparently, I do not cut the lettuce in my salad correctly. Nor my green beans! And I will never find the kind of man I am looking for if I eat green beans like a piglet. You can all breathe a sigh of relief, though; by the time we'd finished the meal, I had mastered the art of green bean consumption to my mother's standards. On the ferry ride there, we kind of proved that we were tourists by standing outside on the front of the boat taking pictures while all the locals slept in booths inside. As revenge for 26 years of listening to her bitch about the way I eat my food, I considered just being anorexic for awhile and making her pick up the hospital bill and then being like "SEE MOM? YOU SHOULD HAVE JUST BEEN HAPPY THAT I WAS EATING AT ALL!!!" But I can't really go thirty minutes without eating, so instead I took embarrassing video of her on the ferry -- dancing! -- and I'm posting it here for all the world to see. I love you, Mom! Tomorrow, we are going to take a little road trip to Friday Harbor, so there is a chance I will not have Internet access when the photos of the Brangelina babies arrive on People.com at 7 pm EST. This is kind of devastating to me, and I considered telling my mom to come back some other time, but, as you can see from this video, she is old and decrepit and I'm not sure how long we'll have her around. So we're going to take the road trip, and I'll get the pics posted by tomorrow night. And on Monday I'll scan in the entire 30-page spread for ya'll! Hooray! /> As most of you readers know, my darling mother is in town visiting me for a few days. This evening, we decided to take the ferry to Bainbridge Island to have dinner. We ate at an INCREDIBLE restaurant called the Four Swallows. I know, it sounds like cheap porn, but it was actually a very, very fantastic restaurant with amazing food, service and ambiance. We absolutely adored it. I also had the opportunity to hear my mother's opinions on table manners for the first time in soooo many months. Oh...