Today's Evil Beet Gossip

“Drink, Play, Fuck”

Did you guys all read Elizabeth Gilbert's Eat, Pray, Love? OMG how good was it??? Loved loved LOVED that book. Now, comedy writer Andrew Gottlieb is releasing the male version of the book, titled Drink, Play, F@#K. The plot? It "tells the fictional story of Bob Sullivan, a man who, seeking solace after his wife leaves him, goes on a bender in Ireland, takes a gambling jaunt to Las Vegas and a embarks on a sex-tourism trip to Thailand." The book won't even be available until next year, but Warner Bros has already purchased the movie rights....

CONTEST: Tell Me Why Jesus Is Sexy

How much do you guys looooove contests??? I'm particularly excited about this one. The folks behind Hamlet 2 are giving away prize packs to promote the film, which actually looks really hilarious. You can check out the preview here. It's got Amy Poehler and Elizabeth Shue, and it looks like a lot of fun. Here are the prizes: One Grand Prize Winner Sexy Jesus Doll Sexy Jesus Surfer Shirt Five Runner-Ups Movie Poster Bumper Stickers You'll understand the whole sexy Jesus ...

Katie Holmes is a Woman on a Mission

You will all wear peg-and-roll jeans this season. You must. Katie will see to it. Do you think it's possible that there's a secret coded message here? Maybe somewhere in the creases of the roll is encoded directions for freeing her from the prison Tom locks her up in at night? That's the only way this makes sense to me. I've never seen Katie so passionate about a fashion trend before. This is a cry for help, you guys. ...

Scotty’s Ashes Don’t Quite Make It Into Orbit

I don't know why I'm so genuinely sad about this, but I am. Like, reading it hurt my little evil heart. Actor James Doohan -- who played Scotty on Star Trek -- was one of 208 people whose ashes were supposed to be sent out to orbit in space following Saturday's launch of Spacex's Falcon 1. Unfortunately, there were technical problems with the rocket, and flight contact was lost only three minutes into the flight. So his ashes never made it into orbit. This is the third failed atte...

Still Going Strong!

It's rare that we see them out in public together, but Jerry Seinfeld cozied up to his wife of nearly nine years, Jessica, at a luncheon she co-hosted in Amagansett, New York. You know, I totally didn't know this, but I just read that Jessica Seinfeld (nee Sklar) had just returned home to New York from a three-week honeymoon in Italy with her first husband when she met Jerry at the gym. She promptly divorced the guy she'd just married to be with Jerry. Ouch! That's pretty dirty, yo. I was never a b...

Lauren Conrad Is Totally Emmy Material

Heh. It looks like Lauren Conrad will be at a presenter at this year's Emmy awards. No, wait, it gets worse. The models who hand out the awards? Will be wearing dresses from Lauren's clothing line. Heidi and Spencer must be furious. But I can live with this, as long as Lauren Conrad does not, at any point, actually win an Emmy. I mean, do you think she could submit herself for Best Costume Director for her work on The Hills? ...

MKO Talks Back

As rumors swirled Monday morning that Mary-Kate Olsen was being uncooperative with DEA agents -- and implying that she may have been responsible for selling him the OxyContin that contributed to his overdose (I like how I say this as though I weren't one of the people spreading the rumor) -- Mary-Kate's lawyer was quick to fight back. "Despite tabloid speculation, Mary-Kate Olsen has nothing whatsoever to do with the drugs found in Heath Ledger's home or his body, and does not know where he...