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Benji Madden Wrote a Song About Paris Hilton

April 30, 2008
Evil Beet
Uncategorized
21 Comments

Isn’t it every girl’s dream to have a rock star write a song about you?

Well, Paris Hilton has officially realized that dream.

Benji Madden has written a song about his girlfriend, Paris Hilton. It’s called “Shine Your Light [Into the Vast Cavern That Is My Vagina, Because I Think The Last Guy Left His Car Keys In There].” No, I’m kidding. It’s just called “Shine Your Light.” And I bet it really, really sucks.

Says Paris: “He actually wrote me a beautiful song, and actually recorded it in the studio. He surprised me with it. It’s called, ‘Shine Your Light.’ It’s this really beautiful love song about me. It was the sweetest thing that anyone has ever done for me.”

Oh, Paris. I hate you so.

21 CommentsLeave a comment

  • Admittedly, I absolutely adore Paris Hilton, but your elongated version of the song title is hilarious.

  • It IS every *girl’s* dream. Unfortunately, she hasn’t been a “girl” in a LONG time.

  • Glad he wrote it for HER, because no one else will want to hear that crap. Good Charlotte sucks pretty much anyway. When they were first out on the music scene, they played at Pointfest in St.Louis. Joel was literally handing people free cd’s and hawking t-shirts for the band. I declined(as well as many other people who passed up the freebie cd’s) as I was hanging out with the douche bags from Alien Ant Farm, and thought I’d be cool and turn down a free cd from the Madden’s band. I was an idiot that day, because another little known act, by the name Eminem, was playing the festival too. A guy with Eminem came up to me and my girlfriend and asked us if we wanted to hang out with them in their tour bus, but my IDIOT friend said, no way because she thought he was a nobody. What did we end up doing that night? Hang out with the douche’s from Alien Ant Farm and then they asked me, since I had a car, if I would give their manager a ride to another hotel so they could get this one specific guitar on a plane to Chicago so they could be photographed for Rolling Stone two days later. Then they asked me if I would pick up food for them at Taco Bell on my way back. My friend wanted to stay behind with the band because she was going to f@#$ the lame ass drummer. I gave the manager a lift to the hotel he needed to go to (mind you, they wanted me to pay for the food and they would pay me when I got back)and I went home. My point, I could have hung out with Eminem, who would have been a lot cooler than Alien Ant Farm for sure. None of this had much to do with the story about Paris and Benji, but I told it anyway.

  • Eminem is fat. “Shine your light” sounds like it was written for the cop that arrested Paris. Lame.

  • “Shine Your Light [Into the Vast Cavern That Is My Vagina, Because I Think The Last Guy Left His Car Keys In There].” AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! I seriously needed a good laugh today. *sighs gratefully* Thanks, Beet. ;)

  • personally, it makes me sick to my stomach the fact that Benji is dating Paris hilton! just the thought of those two together makes me want to vomit. to be honest i have the biggest crush on Benji, and now i dont even know him anymore. to me i think Paris wants to F%@* any guy she wants. no matter if they are with another girl or not. my point…she is nothing but the worlds nastiest bitch ever. she makes me sick!! >:P