A Note from Management

Happy Monday, ya’ll!!

I’m flying back from Miami this morning so I’ll be MIA until around lunchtime in LA. Get it? MIA? Miami? Ha ha. I slay me. I have had the most amazing time in this city — now I understand why Will Smith wrote an entire song about it. What a vibrant and friendly city. Thanks to those of you who sent me ideas about culturally enriching activities in which I might participate while here; instead, I alternated my time between three bars called Tavern, Sandbar and Mr. Moe’s. Talk about diverse. They were like a whole two blocks apart! Oh, and then Sandbar ran out of Red Bull and I really wanted Red Bull so I left to go look for a mini mart and wandered a little far and suddenly I was in this ghetto and this crackhead with one leg and a bicycle is like “Honey, you are walking in the wrong direction” and I’m like “I just want Red Bull!” and so the (nice) crackhead with one leg and a bicycle gave me an escort to the mini mart and I gave the crackhead two dollars to buy crack. So that was pretty cultural of me, I think.

Now on to other matters.

Over the past month or two, I’ve had a lot of you contact me about wanting to know more about who I am, what I look like, how I turned out this way, who raised me, etc. I think it’s kind of obnoxious when certain bloggers (not naming names, but you know who you are … ahem … Perez) pepper a celeb gossip blog with 100 photos of themselves every week. So I’m not going to do that. If you come here for the gossip and the snark, that’s what you’re gonna get. If you are one of those people who wants to know a little more about my life, I’ve added a photos section, where you can check out photos of me and my friends and my life. I’ve got a few pics of me up there now, and will add to it from all the pics I took in Miami, and we’ll go from there.

And now, the most important thing of all:

CONGRATULATIONS to Beet reader and my friend Emily, who got engaged to a truly wonderful man this weekend. Emily was one of our very first readers and fans, all the way back in the early days, so we know she has fantastic taste. Everyone here at The Beet wishes Emily and Adam our sincerest congratulations and all the best in the future. (And this is also the cheapest engagement present we could think up.) Welcome to the family, Emily!