I feel obliged to at least touch base with you guys on this topic, although I’d rather keep coverage of Britney in rehab to a minimum, to give her some time to get back on her feet. But here’s the round-up at this point.
Word from insiders is that Britney is — gasp! — struggling in rehab! She doesn’t want to be there and she doesn’t think she belongs there! She doesn’t like all those pesky rehab rules and she is angry with her family for pressuring her to go to rehab.
So it turns out that Britney Spears is like basically everyone else who goes to rehab ever. Nobody ends up at Promises because they have done a really fantastic job of managing their lives and emotions, or because they are super-duper good at taking the advice of the people who love and care about them, or because there’s a smoother path to health for them. Everyone is a whiny, angry pain in the ass during their first couple weeks of rehab. No one’s happy about the rules. No one has so much fun detoxing. No one is really grateful to be there — not at first. I think they worry more about you if you’re pleasant in the first week. They assume you snuck in drugs.
Oh, and she has also reportedly been battling bulimia since she was sixteen. There’s a cute little bit in some British rag about Britney throwing up her pills: “For the first few days, she’d take her tablets,” says a source, “then go off and eat breakfast or lunch. She was throwing the whole lot up, so, naturally, her medications weren’t working. Now the medical experts know why, her progress should pick up a little speed.†This is so funny to me, because, see, Americans working at American rehab facilities don’t say things like “tablets” or “the whole lot” or even “medical experts.” In America we say “pills” and “all of them” and “doctors.” But if you’re a British magazine with British writers inventing a source and a quote, then I guess you might say “tablets,” etc. Sheesh. Give me a break.
Get better, Britney. We’re rooting for ya over here.