FROM: Kelsey Grammer
TO: Everybody in Kelsey Grammer’s Address Book
SUBJECT: Camille smells like beef jerkey
EMAIL TEXT: goodnight
Oh, no! Kelsey is so humiliated and completely sorry you received that email last night — the one with the subject line about how his ex-wife Camille smells like beef jerky — but he super-promises he wasn’t the one who sent it.
Eh. Sounds to me like somebody staggered home late at night, fired off a nonsensical email about his ex, and blacked out. Now that’s a story I can identify with.
Nonetheless, Page Six is reporting that Grammer was “hacked” by a “prankster.” That report conflicts with Grammer’s own version of the story, which is so much more banal: although the email account is in Grammer’s name, it’s a “shared account,” and “third parties” can access it.
Grammer emailed his contact list a curt non-apology, writing, “May I suggest it is ‘they’ who owe you an apology.” Did you read it in a haughty Frasier Voice? I know I did.
Whatever. Own your mistake, Kelsey Grammer! If you’re willing to sign your name to anything and everything your friends are sending from “your” email address, you obviously need to find better friends.
What I’m really saying is, stop giving all your passwords to this guy:
What’s wrong with beef jerky? Smells better than rotten gash.
Just one more champagne, maybe one more sleeping pill, and we might’ve gotten a more incriminating email.