Being a tutor for the offspring of Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin would be a pretty sweet gig, if you ask me. The pay is $98,000 a year, you work two to four hours a day, you get a free apartment of your very own in London. Plus, you get to travel around with the ever happy couple on their dime, and can you even imagine all the enlightening talks you could have with Gwyneth in passing? It would be a seriously awesome job.
The only problem? You have to be perfect.
If you can’t teach ancient Greek, Latin, French and Spanish to a five- and seven-year-old and play at least two instruments and know how to sail and play tennis, then keep movin’. I mean, if you didn’t go to Oxford or Cambridge then maybe you’d still have a shot, but seriously, if you don’t know how to sail, then how dare you presume that you can teach a child anything.
Oh, Gwyneth. You can raise your children however you want, of course, but let’s tone down on the the pretentiousness, all right?
Wow. I qualify.
At the same time, for $98,000 and all those perks, I think she deserves to have a sailing, tennis-playing, instrument wielding historian that has a knack with children.
Agreed, Christina.
Agreed!
I get why she wants the kids to know Latin, but Ancient Greek? That’s just mean.