So I didn’t watch the entire Golden Globes award ceremony — in fact, I only got through about 40 minutes of it before I had to go to more important things like stare at the wall. I thought Ricky Gervais was pretty funny, which clearly sets me apart from everyone else in that room. I have never seen a group of award attendees look less happy to be there. Like it’s some gross imposition to have to leave their homes on a rainy Sunday and figuratively jack each other off for three hours while wearing ridiculous expensive dresses that they didn’t have to pay for.
And here’s the thing: The older I get, the less impressed I am with this shit. When I was younger, it was all like, “Oh my God, they’re all so glamorous and beautiful and perfect,” and now I’m kind of like “These people look old and worked.” Maybe they just need to stop broadcasting this shit in HD? I dunno. Awards shows are just disappointing to me lately.
I will say this, though: There were no giant misses on the red carpet. No one looked absolutely horrendous. People also didn’t take a lot of risks this year, which may be because of the rain and may be because of Haiti and may be because of the economy and may be because they’re all too busy sitting around wondering which of them is going to OD next to spend much time discussing options with Rachel Zoe, who really ought to be eating the dresses rather than selecting them.
Some winners in my mind: Lea Michele, Kate Hudson, Diane Kruger, Jennifer Morrison and Christina Hendricks, who is just hot as balls. Oh, and Olivia Wilde is still the most beautiful woman to ever walk the face of the planet.
Some sadnesses I observed:
You guys, Matthew Fox is old now. I don’t know at what point this happened, I don’t know where exactly the line was crossed from hotness into un-hot old-itude, but it happened, and it’s terribly depressing to me. I really thought Matt Fox would age well. I think he was my first celebrity crush. I almost rented the apartment next door to him in Manhattan Beach once, with a fool-proof plan to steal him away from his wife and be with him forever, but thank God my roommate didn’t want to pay the extra $200 in rent, because Matt Fox didn’t age well. That’s so disturbing to me, you guys.
Listen, Mo’Nique, I’m glad you won your award and I think you were absolutely brilliant in Precious and I’m so happy for you for all your success, but Jesus Christ, woman, did you not shave your legs?
This is Mickey Rourke’s date. Someone shoot her. Or me. I don’t really care which anymore.
Oh, and people won awards at this thing, too. People like Sandra Bullock, who beat out other people like Gabourey Sidibe and Helen Mirren for her mind-blowing performance as Sandra Bullock in A Sandra Bullock Movie. FML. Full list of winners is here. Click at your own risk.
A billion more pics in the gallery below. Enjoy.
“…discussing options with Rachel Zoe, who really ought to be eating the dresses rather than selecting them. ”
I love you.
I actually watched the entire thing. It was in the background actually, while I was doing more important things. I think Ricky Gervais is funny and like you said, everyone else seemed bored.
Regarding the dresses, it’s fine that Monique didn’t shave her legs but she doesn’t have to show us. She just bothers me to no end. I thought Penelope Cruz (my crush!) looked gorgeous. Helen Mirren, I thought looked spectacular. I’m glad Sandra Bullock didn’t look a complete mess for one (just partially) and Tina Fey: what were you thinking? She’s pretty and funny but either can’t dress herself or can’t find someone to do it right.
Forgot to add, Christina Hendricks is gorgeous and her boobs are out of control. Elisabetta looks trashy to me. It’s probably that barb wirey tattoo. There was also a couple of dresses that looked cheap because of the fabric. See Lauren Graham and Cameron Diaz.
Jane Krakowski is annoying even in pictures and lastly, when did Amy Adams get pregnant?
THANK YOU! Love love LOVE all the dresses, this was a fun post! I could look at awards show dresses all. day. long!
many beautiful dresses, but i am more concerned that even in 2010, people still have foundation put on their faces that is a 50% color difference from the rest of their body. thats so embarrassing looking!
I’m sorry… Matthew Fox what?? I have to respectfully DISAGREE!! Like, wtf, seriously??
I agree with you, rvh. Matthew Fox has his hair swept to the side and doesn’t have the facial hair going on, like usual. I still think that he is super hot….yum :)
ewww… he’s covered in dandruff!
It’s not dandruff… it was raining at the Globes.
Hear hear! Matthew Fox looks GREAT!
I think you should have included Christina Aguilera’s Versace gown. Kate, Christina and Drew (in that order) were the best dressed. I cant look at Gabourey anymore. I just get uncomfortable. I hope she is trying to lose weight. Everytime I see her being interviewed she is bubbly and happy, but in the back of my mind Im thinking she is ridiculously unhealthy. Its great to love yourself, but love yourself enough to take care of yourself.
Monique has been known to say that she doesn’t believe in shaving her legs.
whoa matthew fox does look old all of a sudden. must be all that sun exposure ravaging his skin in hawaii. wear sunscreen.
the woman in the red dress behind mo’nique looks FABULOUS! the perfect dress.
and finally, please note you guys it is incredibly distracting you guys to read you guys you guys in a you guys post. can it with the you guys you guys. enough already! it’s like a nervous tick. edit yourself!
I’m sorry, but Matthew Fox looks amazing. Gorgeous man!
Matthew Fox is still a hottie, but where in the heck was Josh Holloway??? That man could ring my bell any old time.
Yeah… ya think??? ;) Yum yum yum. Although, in all honesty, I watched him on Ellen and he really struck me as being… I don’t know, dumb? Really un-charismatic. I think it’s the combo of his stellar looks and the writers on Lost that have fed that crush – I think he would get old pretty fast in person. But I’d still hit it. Hard.
Oh no! What a bummer! No matter. It’s all a fantasy anyway, and let’s be honest, I’d only need him for one night. :)
matthew fox is gorgeous.
Matt Fox looks like Mitt Romney, and now I need a drink.